How to Cultivate the Habit of Hospitality
Ever wonder how some people seem to be a natural at hosting? They seem to be born gatherers-of-people, and their homes are the hub of social gatherings.
They have the habit of hospitality, and you can to with these five simple tips!
My Attempt
For awhile, I’d longed to be just such a hostess. I read the tips and tricks, learning what etiquette there was to consider and ways to set your guests at ease and how to lay a table.
My husband and I laid out our plan, as we prepared for some of our first guests to arrive. He would greet them and take their coats, after a few minutes we’d gather everyone together for a blessing, I’d give instructions for the food, and we’d be off!
After a few attempts, however, I felt that something was still missing. I still felt nervous to have others for dinner, and somehow, I still didn’t feel as effortless and laid back as those women who I admired.
What was I missing, and what did those hostesses I admired have in common?
That was when I discovered it. It wasn’t an etiquette protocol (although those do have a useful purpose), and it wasn’t some trick of the trade (even though there are tips to make it easier)!
The Key: The Habit of Hospitality
These women had the habit of hospitality. They just did it, and they did it frequently. They had done it so much that it didn’t seem to stress them out.
They had their own hospitality routines established, and it didn’t seem to be any more laborious than brushing their teeth or washing their dishes.
If you want to establish the habit of hospitality and become an effortless hostess, here are five tips I’ve found helpful (plus a free printable to help).
Tip #1: Start Small
When you are first starting out, I’d advise starting with a few people you feel very comfortable with. Small groups of close friends, or a few family members are a great way to take your first few steps in hospitality. The conversation will flow easily, and they’ll be forgiving even if you aren’t the most experienced hostess!
If you are intimidated by a few friends, just invite one person (maybe your sister or mom) for brunch and a short chat!
Tip #2: Create a Signature Hospitality Routine
A signature hospitality routine is the basic framework you follow for hosting! It can include a few go-to meals you can easily whip-up and rely on when hosting, activities you enjoy doing with guests and you have on hand, or even certain types of events you typically like to host.
Maybe you like to host Saturday morning brunches, and you have a make-ahead croissant breakfast casserole or some sourdough scones that are delicious every time.
Or perhaps you prefer to host Sunday lunches, and have a few easy slow-cooker meals you can rotate between.
Figuring out what works best for you and taking a little time to structure your hospitality routine is a huge step in cultivating the habit of hospitality and becoming a stress-free host!
For more tips and ideas on creating your own signature hospitality routine, check out this post!
Tip #3: Set a Goal (to help you grow the habit of hospitality)
When my husband and I set out to become better at hospitality, we set a goal to host something in our house at least once a month.
Sometimes it was a family dinner with our parents and siblings. Other times it was a close friend for lunch, or a few newlywed couples for supper and games.
No matter who it was, we just needed to host something at least once a month! Having this goal really helped grow our confidence and become more accustomed to entertaining.
Tip #4: Make a List
Making a list of people or groups that you want to have over can give you a great place to start.
Once you have a list of ideas, you can simply pull out your planner, pick out two or three dates you have available, and reach out to a few people on your list.
Within a few short minutes, you’ll be well on your way to having your next hosting opportunities scheduled!
Click HERE to download your copy!
Tip #5: Just schedule it
Sometimes, thinking ahead too much about something can overcomplicate it in our minds, and deter us from just doing the thing. I do advocate for planning and being intentional, but there is a balance.
In the end, the best way to cultivate the habit of hospitality and become an effortless hostess is just to do it! So just get something on your calendar!
Even if something comes up and you have to reschedule it, or you still feel unsure of yourself, just schedule it.
Each time you host, you’ll gain confidence and be one step closer to cultivating that habit of hospitality.
Conclusion (for gaining the habit of hospitality)
So there you go! These ideas are simple, but can be so effective in helping you gain the habit of hospitality and become that effortless hostess you long to be.
I hope you feel inspired, and enjoy opening your home to some friends soon!
Want more hospitality inspiration? Check out this post about stress-free hosting with your own signature hospitality routine!
Thank you for all of the tips. I really enjoy having people over and this tips will be so helpful.
I love the idea of having a few go-to company meals. Now I understand why my grandmothers had a few recipes labeled “company meals” in her recipe box.
How neat!! I love that. Sounds like it has been a tried and true hack for awhile!
We have lived in our new house for three years now and have yet to invite friends over. We have family events several times a year but just not friends. I am excited to take these easy steps to start hosting fun events in our home aside from the regular holidays.
I love this! I also want to host more frequently and need to just schedule it haha
The *signature* hospitality routine is a great idea! Thanks for sharing!